I Know
by Soccer-Geek
Summary: J/TK fluff and mush with a side of implied H/L. My version of why Han said 'I know' in ESB. AU from post NJO


I Know

Tenel Ka's POV:

I crouched beside Jacen, taking his hand. His brown eyes were glassy and his hair was strewn with grass; in any other situation, I would have smiled at the reminder of our days at the Jedi Academy. Less than two minutes ago, I saw him get on edge, but, before he could tell me what was wrong, he pushed me out of the way as the sound of a shot rang out. The bolt had hit Jacen in the abdomen and he was starting to go into shock.

"Stay with me Jacen," I told him, squeezing his hand. He blinked slowly up at me.

"Told you," He rasped.

I instantly regretted rolling my eyes at him when he said that, unless information proved false, he was going to be my bodyguard until Jaina, Lowie and Zekk could decipher a coded comm message for me. Jacen had said that he thought that it was a warning message from an assassin trying to get to the throne, but I still thought he was crazy.

And I regretted telling him so.

Finally, just as I thought I was going insane with worry, the medics arrived and began transferring Jacen to a stretcher. I hiked up the skirt of my gown to follow them, watching as Jacen's eyes slid closed.

I watched from a few feet away as the medics began treating Jacen, wringing my skirt nervously; I tried hard to send Jacen soothing thoughts, but I could not calm myself down. My blood ran cold as I heard one medic tell the nurse to begin prepping Jacen for surgery. I forced myself to stand beside Jacen and hold his hand, trying hard to not fear for his life.

Jacen's eyes opened partially and he looked up at me. He mumbled something unintelligible. I gave his hand a gentle squeeze.

"Everything is going to be alright," I told him. He nodded slowly. On impulse, I leaned down and kissed his forehead. What if he didn't survive the surgery? What if he never knew how I felt about him? I wouldn't let him die without knowing.

"I love you." I told him.

Through the pain, Jacen grinned up at me.

"I know," He whispered back and his eyes slid shut again into a peaceful sleep.

His hand was torn from mine and I was left standing there, wondering, did he love me? All he had said was 'I know'. Did he feel the same way? I stood there, fighting internally with myself: Does Jacen Solo love me?

I looked up at a breathless Jaina Solo, hardly believing that it was truly her. She had changed, both physically and emotionally, since we were children. Her features, which had been getting more defined and feminine and ultimately more beautiful since she was fifteen (Jacen was always complaining that it is one of the injustices of having a female twin), were currently masked by her worry for her brother. She had already lost Anakin, and nearly lost Jacen; she wasn't going to go through that again.

Behind Jaina were her parents, both of whom reflected the same look of worry on Jaina's face. They, too, must have been thinking about how they lost their younger son, and didn't want to go through the same with their older son.

"What happened?" Jaina demanded in a whisper as she hugged me.

I whispered an explanation back. Jaina nodded, then looked over at her parents.

"They're really taking this hard," She told me as she watched her father pull her mother onto his lap and lay her head against his chest. Years of marriage, three children, the death of one and two wars, and they still act like they are newlyweds. At the moment depressed newlyweds, but newlyweds nevertheless.

"They have hardly said two words since you called, but I can tell." Jaina continued.

"Jaina," I said, in a chocked voice. "I need to ask you something."

"Anything, Tenel Ka," Jaina said. We sat down in a corner and Jaina looked at me, waiting.

"Well," I said slowly. "Before Jacen was taken in for surgery, he regained consciousness for a minute or so. And-" I choked on the words, unable to get them out.

"And?" Jaina urged.

"And I told Jacen that I love him," I spat out.

"Finally," Jaina mumbled. "And what did Jacen say in response?"

"He said 'I know'. But maybe I did not hear him correctly or-"

"Oh, you heard him correctly," Jaina said, snickering.

"What is so funny?" I demanded. "And how do you know that is what he said?" Jaina nodded towards her parents.

"Chewie used to tell us this story all the time about how, once, when they were captured on Cloud City so Darth Vader could get to Uncle Luke, Vader had Dad frozen in carbonite. Two minutes before that happened, Mom did something I don't think anyone expected: she told Dad that she loved him. Dad nodded at her and told her 'I know'."

"Are all Solo men that bad at expressing their feelings?" I asked.

"I'm about at that conclusion," Jaina said with a laugh. "Mom said that, throughout the time she, Chewie, Uncle Luke and Lando were searching for Dad, she would wonder if Dad did love her, as all he had said was 'I know'. Dad's never explained why he said that, but I always had this sneaking suspicion that he wanted to keep her mind busy, wondering about their love for each other, wondering if it would hold. Jacen agreed with me, saying that he thought it was a distraction so Mom wouldn't worry about him."

And that was when I figured it out: Jacen, through our Force-connection, caught that I was worrying about him. By responding 'I know', he kept me puzzled and not at all worried.

"I am not sure if I should kiss him or smack him," I said.

Jaina just laughed.

Jacen's POV:

I woke up feeling lightheaded and groggy.

"Where am I?" I asked.

"Med-bay," Due to the medicine, I couldn't tell who was speaking to me and I could barely see, I was so sleepy.

"I'm sorry," I said. "I've clearly had too much medication. Who are you?"

"Someone who loves you."

I was instantly alert.

"Tenel Ka?" I whispered.

She didn't say anything. She just leaned down to me and kissed me.

"I love you," I told her when I finally had my breath back.

Tenel Ka grinned at me.

"I know." She told me.


End file.
